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by Senior Pastor Denis Beausejour
Series: HEALTHY FAMILIES IN HECTIC TIMES
Today's Thesis: A healthy life and family requires healthy friendships. Introduction
So far in this series we have looked at some of the most important relationships in life: with God, our spouse, our parents, our children, our work, and our money. Today, we will look at the unique and challenging nature of friendship. We'll look at starting friendships, building them, and keeping them, through the lens of the book of Proverbs - the portion of the Bible that deals most directly with relational wisdom. Note, the text for today's message was selected by looking at the appearance of the word "friend" or "friends" in the book of Proverbs.
Such a "word study" brings great insight to the Bible, using a simple tool called a concordance. Here is a free online concordance which you can also find here: Strong's Exhaustive Concordance (Bible.Crosswalk.com)
What makes friendship unique?
True friendship is a form of love that in many respects goes beyond relationships like family and marriage. In cultures that are liberal in orientation, sexuality prevails. In conservative cultures, it is family that prevails. In communism, it is the civil or neighbor relationships that prevail. Friendship transcends all three of these cultures. While family and marriage have a huge influence on us, we ultimately require friends, community, to make it in life. Yet, the word "friends" has been used indiscriminately!
Friendship Wisdom from Proverbs: 1. Choosing wisely 12:26 - The righteous man "makes an investigation of his close friend".
14:20 - Beware fair-weather "friends"
16:28 - Beware destructive "friends"
17:9 - Loving versus judging
2. Committing entirely 17:17 - more reliable than family- always there
18:24 - more closely attuned than family
19:4, 6-7 - circumstances reveal a lack
3. Caring: Calmly and Candidly 22:11 - speaking the truth in love
22:24 - not angry or prone to reject truth
27:6 - willing to hurt to avoid harm - no flattery
27:9-10 - heart secrets - transparent, vulnerable
lets you in to their heart, always there for you
4. Challenging: Calling out your best 27:17 - sparks flying, bracing, seeking higher ground
Do we see the problem with this picture? Look at John 15:13-15
What an awesome Friend
Becoming and living like a friend of God
Resources for further study:
1. Read John 13-17 slowly
2. Essay on Friendship by C.S. Lewis in "The Four Loves"
3. Friendship essay by Ralph Waldo Emerson - on-line at: www.emersoncentral.com
4. Watch the Lord of the Rings Trilogy (available from your favorite video store.)
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